Not sure how much I would like to spend much time in a pub like this:
Micropubs are a relatively new concept in beer and cider drinking. I would describe them as a good old-fashioned “Drinking Den”. Basically, a relatively small, one room establishment, selling cask ales, real cider and soft drinks. No fizzy lager here, I’m afraid. Guinness, “smooth” ale and other keg beverage slurpers, will be disappointed too. All these drinks will be declared void on the beer menu chalkboard. Wine and sprits are also swerved. But there is no music, no television and no profiteering gaming machines to lighten your pockets either. Food is also off the menu – but you may spy a few bags of pork scratchings and other nibbles - if you are lucky. The Beer Shack will be a simple pub.
Are there chairs? I hope a washroom. But maybe those things are too needy for the truly focused fine beer obsessive. No wifi I hope. And a cell phone jammers. What else must the craft proper beer echo chamber lack? Anything made of ink and paper? Yes, reading material is pretentious. Imposes on proper conversation. Smacks of individuality, too. Undermines the community.
One good thing about the story is it makes me think about what I really like in a pub. A TV with the game on but no sound. Who needs the blether of the pro sports announcer? Not I. Comfortable chairs. So rare in places these days. It can be a hard bench as long as it is tucked neatly in a corner with plenty of leaning opportunities. Staff who don't ask me how the meal is. Who maybe even know my name. At least I should know theirs. A stain on the carpet or a nick in a table that you caused more than a decade ago would be nice as well. A good view out the window for when the weather is rotten and a decent outside sitting area for when it isn't. Lamb on the menu. Salmon, too, and venison if you are lucky enough to be there on the right day. And no friggin' aficionados. Maybe even a sign that says "aficionados not served". That would be nice.