What is it about good beer that makes people layer ridiculous claims over it, against it or in its favour. What did beer do to deserve this? It's just a fluid of simple natural ingredients that offers a little intoxication and a little nutrition. I had a Korea tea today made of green tea and brown rice. Something like this. Simple. Tasty. Like beer without the buzz. Why can't beer be happy to be like that Korean tea? Here's a few of the beer claims which have passed by in recent days:
⇒ Beer goes not cause weight gain: Again, with the magic of beer. Advocates of this silliness need to rely on the "guns don't kill people, people do" argument as it is clear that beer has a significant number of calories and if you do not reduce your other caloric intake or begin to run daily, yes, beer will make you fatter. Unless you drink it in daily 100 ml doses. And if you swap out food for beer - what other nutrients are you losing? Note: it's "industry-sponsored research" produced for the British Beer and Pub Association. Crystal Luxmore has a far more balanced view which includes a pragmatic warning to craft beer nerds.
⇒ You need to buy the glass: Advanced marketing science in the hands of US big craft have brought us the next thing - an IPA specific glass. Tragically, there is no double IPA version. Mr. B makes the point that the glass itself is harmless but, as with so many things related to good beer, much effort is being made to manufacture need. Me, I swirl the beer in whatever glass by - ready for it - slow movement of my hand. Experiment if you dare taking on unbranded responsibility.
⇒ Valentine's means beer with chocolate: Brave is the man who tries this without giving warning. Sam Adams Boston Lager? Let me know how the relationship weathers that one, will you? Beers with chocolate flavour added? Safer but I'd still recommend giving fair warning. Days ahead. Likely too late now already. Perhaps plan for 2014 now. Or take Jordan's advice and do something that's self-evidently slightly nuts and may well actually taste good.
⇒ Beer innovation drives opportunity: Fun following along with the hashtag #beerinnovation today as marketing and PR placed adjectives like "passionate," "inspiring," "brilliant" and "excellent" before nouns like "networking" and "growth" and "future"! Hey, I didn't type that exclamation mark!! Or those!!! Clearly, the computer is getting excited about inspring growth and a brilliant networking future. Best of all, it was a summit which is great because summits are brilliant.
Can we live without these things? Are we better off without them? Is beer? Imagine a world where people respect beer as an energy powerhouse, drank from normal glassware, gave loved ones treats the loved ones liked and passed on the saving from not layering marketing costs on to your beer. Simpler, cheaper, better balanced and happier. Like hyeonmi nokcha. Or yesterday's parsnip soup. Who wouldn't want that?