The BBC has an interesting story today about the lengths to which macro-brewers have gone to figure out how to attract customers:
Green beer. Blue beer. Beer with the frothy 'head' in the middle of the glass, rather than at the top. Beer which emits light..."We've done lots of things which are technically very possible," Mr Axcell says.
So sayeth Barry Axcell, chief brewer at SABMiller. And so might he so sayeth as beer that emits light, you could be thinking, is possibly the greatest...yet surely the dumbest...use of science and money you have ever heard about. Mock not, says I. While I may not know if the real but unspoken problem problem is that it makes itself skunky but we have to trust that SABMiller does not undertake these experiments for their own giggles...as Mr. Axcell himself further indicates:
"The British brewing industry has declined and you could argue that was partly due to its failure to innovate," says Mr Axcell. "Beer comes with a lot of heritage and tradition so to innovate successfully, you need a functional beer with a functional benefit - one that has got to deliver something for the customer.
Deliver something...like glow in the dark...beer. Yet, aka MacroBrewCo does not even seem to have been the originator of the glow in the dark bevvie. Apparently, there was a little stir about the idea back in around the time of the new millenium. And, it seems, that the patent-holding¹ company in Arizona is continuing the exploration, you know, for that nightlight in a glass, as illustrated so...glowingly. It was even featured at the Institute of Food Technologists trade show in 1998, for heaven's sake. If tobacco can glow as above why not beer?
Understand me. I mock not science. I seek to praise it. It is clearly SABMiller that apparently stands between me and that fine rich Trappist dubbel that glows gently from its core like the last embers of a Yule log through the miracle of jellyfish luciferase. Come the revolution, all beer shall glow. Oh, yes - one fine day it shall glow.
¹US5876995 in case you were wondering.